wrecked

Lately I've been trying to keep myself busy just to keep my mind off things, but no one ever said it would be easy. Every moment that my mind has the chance to idle, the memories start coming back and I get that wrenching feeling in my chest again. Thinking of the merry times helps a little, but only serves to amplify the fact that I may never have the chance to enjoy them again, although that is probably why they will always be special to me.

Confusion reigns supreme now, and I'm suddenly stuck in the dark again. I thought that maybe learning a couple of new acoustic songs to jam with my buddy at work might help, but somehow I ended up with all the songs that only serve to make me feel worse.. I always feel like I want to talk to someone about things, but at the same time I want to forget it all. I want to distance myself for this period of time to give us some space to breathe and hopefully forget, but I can't stop thinking of her, and find myself repeatedly reaching for the phone, only to find that I don't know what to say. I pretend like everything is fine at work, but I've been feeling terrible since the day.

Today I decided to pick up my Fender Strat and hit some notes for Bon Jovi's I'll Be There For You, but suddenly, for the first time in countless years, the tears came out and I never finished the song. Damn it I need to get through this quickly, but will I allow myself to?



I guess this time you're really leaving
I heard your suitcase say goodbye
And as my broken heart lies bleeding
You say true love it's suicide

You say you'd cry a thousand rivers
And now you're swimming for the shore
You left me drowning in my tears
And you won't save me anymore

Now I'm praying to God you'll give me one more chance, girl

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you

I know you know we've had some good times
Now they have their own hiding place
I can't promise you tomorrow
But I can't buy back yesterday

Baby you know my hands are dirty
And I wanted to be your valentine
I'll be the water when you get thirsty, baby
When you get drunk, I'll be the wine

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you

I wasn't there when you were happy
I wasn't there when you were down
I didn't mean to miss your birthday, baby
I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you