Prelude to the Preview to the Pain.

and so tomorrow's the big day, or at least one of the big days. the national day parade preview! we've been training long and hard for this one, although "long" could have been a lot shorter if not for some stupid people as described in my earlier posts.

i won't deny it, i used to hate being in the damned ndp. to me, it was just a total waste of time. i could have been out there doing something more constructive. but somehow, i don't feel all that hate anymore. maybe i just grew numb to it, or it could be something else. there's just some feeling about being out there in front of 60,000 people.

the adrenaline.

the euphoria.

the thoughts of what might happen if we screwed our segment up.

there's something magnificent about being out there alright.



on other notes, i've decided that some feelings are not meant to be contained for long, no matter how deep you bury them. they just come crawling back out, urging you to do something to satisfy their thirst. this week, i gave in to those feelings. it will most probably end up in suicidal heartaches and pain, but it's not the end result that really counts sometimes. sometimes, the moment is good enough. but whether those moments will be happy for both sides is quite questionable.

"Can't Let You Go" performed by Ritchie Blackmore's Rainbow.